In The Red is at least trying to do something somewhat different, with a stop-start, repetitive, math rock guitar lick, but it sounds too much like the mid- to late-‘90s bands like The Promise Ring or Sunny Day Real Estate — though not in a good way at all.  Too bad for these guys that living in the past does not pay off.

I hope the excellent musicians in this group form a band with its own sound some day.  The talent’s there, but they’re trying too hard to impress, which is never attractive.  Oh yeah, this band also has the dubious distinction of having the same name as the venerable garage/dirt punk label in Detroit, a town that does not fuck around.  Do your fucking homework! The fact that they don’t know this — or think it’s some kind of homage — is just misguided and disturbing.  If you name your band Subpop, it’s just going to confuse people!  Advice: break up, lose the screamo vocals (dated!), move the fuck out of Tampa (a water-headed city if ever there was one), then reform as a straight-ahead three-chord punk three-piece and tell me about how it works out, because I’ll tell you right now — this band ain’t gonna work out, and that’s something none of your friends will tell you because they’re too busy thinking how cool it is you play guitar without messing up once.

I can’t think of a better title for The Anchor’s “Opposite of Awesome,” than the one they chose already, which is pretty much standard mall punk. The vocals ain’t bad, the band is pretty fast and technical…but sorry, I’m just not feeling it, boys.  I’m sure you’ll get plenty of mall punk groupies that are impressed by your purple seven-inch record (maybe you can get your local Hot Topic to sell it on commission!).  This song is like the bad books put out by creative writing grad students that become instantly remaindered and were only put out in the first place as a favor to a friend.  The less said of this instantly forgettable track, the better.

(Kiss of Death Records, PO Box 75550, Tampa, FL 33675)